Nothing to look forward to?

One of the worst things about the current lockdown, and perhaps any lockdown, is the uncertainty. Not knowing how things are going to end or how they will come about is bad enough, but worse still is not having anything to look forward to.

The reality of this was brought home to me in a conversation I was partially involved with. It took place in our local chippy whilst I was waiting – socially distanced of course, for our fish supper to be fried.

As a family we’ve used the same excellent, local chippy for years, and for the majority of that time the business has been owned by a Turkish Cypriot family. Normally there’s the owner and his wife behind the counter, and quite often the proprietor’s father. But for the past few months there’s only been the boss and one of his employees present. It turns out his father managed to get back to Cyprus, before the ban on travel came into force, and I’m assuming his wife is at home, looking after the kids.

It’s one of the couple’s children who made the remark that’s the inspiration of the title of this post, proving there’s a lot of truth in the saying, “Out of the mouth of babes and sucklings.”  The story behind it was related to me and a couple of other customers, whilst we were standing in line waiting for our fish and chips to be cooked.

The normally quite jovial owner told us that lockdown was having a bad effect on his children, cooped up indoors for much of the day and unable to meet or mix with other children.  His daughter has been particularly affected, and the comment she came out with one afternoon, really melted his heart. “Daddy,” she said, “there’s nothing to look forward to anymore.”

“What could I say?” He asked us, and apart from the obvious sympathetic noises, there was very little we could say in reply. The trouble is, that little girl was right, as with lockdown No. 3 in full swing there really is very little to look forward to at present. Of course, this tedious situation won’t last forever – or at least it had better not! But when you’re a child, a month can seem like a longtime, whilst a year appears to go on forever.

When you think about it it’s the little pleasures in life that we all look forward to, as well as some of the bigger ones, which help us get through a busy working week, or a spell of bad weather, and it’s these pleasures, whatever they might be, that are not just important, they are quite often vital in keeping us focused, sane and not freaking out.

Many of us look forward to nights out with friends or meeting up with family, whilst others look towards bigger things. That well-earned summer holiday, short city break, or a meal out with a loved one, all help us get through times of stress or just the mundane pressures associated with everyday living.

For me, its choosing a holiday destination and then carrying out the necessary planning to bring that trip away into reality. Equally, it’s a meet-up with friends where, invariably a visit to a pub will be involved, whether as the main theme or as an aside. A walk in the countryside or, a “Proper Day Out,” where a group of like-minded individuals travels to a town, renowned for its range and variety of decent pubs and, of course, decent beer.

It was one such day out in Burton-on-Trent, almost a year ago, that represented my last such carefree and enjoyable, get together, and my last meticulously planned opportunity to visit a different location.

There will be other such days in the future – these kill-joy public health officials can’t keep us locked in our own homes forever – even though they seemed determined to try their hardest. These obsessive fanatics focused solely on a single issue – Covid, at the moment, fail to understand the value and the pleasure that trips such as these contribute to our happiness and sense of well-being, and how much planning and looking forward to such events matters in all of our lives.

What a dull, boring and uninteresting world we are bequeathing to future generations if we prohibit activities that involve socializing, travel or just enjoying the company of our fellow human beings; all because of a virus with a morbidity rate of around 0.9% when averaged out across the population as a whole.

Economies too, are being ruined by the draconian restrictions on way we live our lives, that are a direct consequence of lockdowns. Adults can understand such measures, and put up with them, providing they are temporary and there is light at the end of the tunnel, but it is different for children.

The anguish of the local fish & chip shop owner’s daughter, about there being nothing to look forward to, must ring a bell with a great many people at present. Unless there is a clear and positive way out of this, we are stoking up a severe crisis in mental health, whilst attempting to avert a not so obvious and proportionally less serious, physical health crisis.