When you've got to go, you've got to go!

I’ve been racking my brains these past few days thinking about something to write, but it’s been a hard slog since my last post, and I’ve really been struggling to find a topic that’s interesting, topical and mildly entertaining. Regrettably, I’ve still only been in two pubs so far, since the partial lifting of restrictions, and I blame that on all work and no play.

Not having been anywhere exciting, let alone different these past few weeks hasn’t helped either, and whilst things might change this coming weekend, I’m still rather stumped regarding a subject that’s relevant, or even remotely connected to the world of beer and pubs.

Fortunately, all is not yet lost as whilst browsing the net at lunchtime, I came across this little piece in the New Statesman and it’s not only about a problem that affects us more as we grow older, but it’s also something that is closely related to beer drinking – or indeed the consumption of any liquid. I’m talking about having to use the toilet – empty one’s bladder to be more precise, and it’s an issue that is becoming more acute as lock-down restrictions are gradually being lifted.

Public toilets up and down the land have been closed for months now, despite many parks and other open spaces remaining open to the public. From the very start of the lock-down, people were encouraged to get some outdoor exercise; a sensible compromise in my view, rather than imprison the population in their own homes 24-7. But with local councils reluctant to reopen public facilities, there has been the inevitable rise in people finding alternative places to do what comes naturally.  

As the saying goes, “When you’ve got to go, you’ve got to go,” so now government ministers are leaning on local authorities to reopen their toilets – in a safe and responsibly social-distanced way, of course! The trouble is many health experts were concerned that toilets might pose a greater risk of spreading Covid-19, than other public places, due to them being dark, enclosed, with a lot of touch points and a high footfall.

These concerns may have been partially true but were probably not quite as serious as many of these self-proclaimed experts believed. There are also various protocols that users of public toilets can adopt to minimise any potential risk, but rather than me listing them out (this is not a public information service), you can find them online.

The New Statesman article bemoaned the fact that many of the nation’s public toilets have been privatised, sold-off for other purposes or closed altogether. Here in Tonbridge we have lost a couple of our public toilets, one having closed completely, whilst the other partially demolished and then rebuilt as a coffee shop – just think of that next time you’re enjoying a cup of coffee!

The affects of this loss weren’t quite so acute, pre-lockdown, as there were plenty of facilities inside shopping centres, along with toilets in pubs, cafés and restaurants, but whilst these establishments are now slowly reopening, there are measure in place restricting the numbers of people who can use them at any one time.

Okay, the issue is probably getting better than it was at the height of lock-down, but the lack of toilet facilities was discouraging people, women in particular, from straying too far from home. Shewee, the manufacturers of the namesake product for women, reported a 700% increase in UK sales since the start of lockdown, providing relief, if you’ll pardon the pun, for scores of women who want to go outdoors and enjoy themselves without having to find the proverbial bush to squat behind.

That’s probably too much information, but Mrs PBT’s was certainly one lady put off from going out a couple of months ago. I won’t repeat her response when I suggested she purchase one of the aforementioned devices, as that is something best kept between husband and wife, but I’m sure you get the gist of the problem.

So with social-distancing and other Covid-19 control measure likely to remain in place for some time to come, and opportunities to enjoy a spot of al-fresco drinking at an all time high, then how about providing us all with some proper relief?

Greyhound back on track

It was somewhat predictable that the second post-lockdown pub visit I should make turned out to be the Greyhound, at Charcott. This charming rural local is just over 10 minutes’ walk from my workplace, and I often stroll near the pub on my regular lunchtime walks.

Tempting though it is, I don’t often call in for the simple reason that I find I hard to stay awake at the best of times, and even a single pint could see me dozing off in front of my computer screen. This Friday was an exception, as not only did I fancy a pint of locally brewed Larkin’s, but I was also keen to see what measures licensees Richard and Fran, had put in place to comply with government guidelines.

The Greyhound reopened on Wednesday, but I thought I’d leave visiting for a couple of days, to allow the pub’s owners sufficient time to make sure all their social distancing measures were working satisfactorily. Wednesday’s weather hadn’t been too good either, with wet and windy conditions prevailing for most of the day.

Although Thursday was marginally better, Friday was always going to be the most appropriate day for my visit. After a busy morning signing off numerous batches of product, I grabbed my jacket and set off on the short walk up Camp Hill towards the tiny hamlet of Charcott.

I had no real idea of what to expect, as I had deliberately avoided walking directly past the Greyhound during the lock-down.  Somehow it didn’t seem right and, if truth be known, I really didn’t want to see the pub all shut-up and empty. Until the start of the emergency situation, it had been thriving and doing a roaring trade, and that was how I wished to remember it.

I was pleasantly surprised as I turned the corner of the lane which lead to the pub, as the first thing I noticed was the re-vamped outdoor drinking area at the of the building. These were roped off from the roadway, with the ropes arranged in order to guide customers towards the entrance.

There a handwritten sign asks visitors to kindly wait for a member of staff to meet them. In my case it was landlady Fran, and it was good to see her again after these past three months. I told her that I just wanted a pint and to sit outside to drink it. Given the warm sunny weather I would have sat outside anyway, but on this occasion, it felt appropriate, even though I could have sat inside, had I wished.

The cask ales on sale were Larkin’s Traditional, plus offerings from Brumaison and Whitstable. I opted for the Larkin’s and Fran brought my freshly pulled pint out for me on a tray. It tasted divine, cool, well-conditioned and at just 3.4% ABV, just the right strength for someone who’d had to return to work.

I sat there enjoying my pint and the moment. Richard, the landlord stopped by for a brief chat and told me he was pleased with how things had gone so far. The pub certainly looked busy enough, not heaving, but here were plenty of people sat out in the garden area to the side of the building.  The waitress was kept on her toes bringing out a selection of different food dishes for the hungry diners, but what was missing were the characters who seemed to be always present, propping up the bar whenever I visited on a Friday.

It’s still early days and I’m sure that over time, the majority of these “good old boys” will drift back. It is characters like them who really make a pub, and when they have returned and are in their rightful place, in front of the bar, we will then know that the worst of this crazy situation is over and things are returning to normal.

In the meantime, it was heartening to see the Greyhound open for business once more and trading quite well, after its enforced period of closure.

A few reflective, mid-week thoughts

These are certainly strange times that we’re living through; unprecedented – certainly in modern times and full of paradoxes.  The situation we’re in at present is also incredibly frustrating and whilst I’ve been saying to people, "be patient," my own patience has worn a little thin.

The news that the nation’s pubs are open at last, is of little use to those, like me, who are still working for a living and the fact that despite orders being down we’re still incredibly busy, is yet another example of a frustrating paradox.

I’ve only managed one pub visit since last weekend, and whilst I intend to make up for this tomorrow, I’m still mighty envious of those whose surfeit of leisure time allows them to go off galivanting around the country once more. So, after all that time spent twiddling my thumbs at the start of lock-down, I now find myself too busy to enjoy all that’s on offer, as the economy slowly opens back up.

Right, that’s enough wining, I’m lucky to still have a job, my health is fairly robust and money I would have spent in pubs and restaurants, or blown on trips abroad, is now safely sitting in the bank. In addition, I will hit state retirement age next April, so perhaps it will then be time to wave goodbye to the world of work – at least on a full-time basis.

There’s no getting away though that, like many others the world over, the current pandemic has knocked my travel plans for six this year, but there will still be time enough once all this is over. For tens of thousands of others, Corona has done far worse than disrupt holiday plans, and it’s important to remember all those who sadly, didn’t make it.

I’m certain that the pandemic and ensuing lock-down, has also caused large numbers of people to reflect upon what they’re doing with their lives, the type of lifestyle they are living and what plans they might have for the future.  The shutdown has also been good for the environment as well, and it’s been good to reconnect with nature, during this time.

That’s all I’ve got to say for the time being. If all goes to plan I’ll have another reopened pub to report on tomorrow, but until then, bye for now!