I’m sure many readers will remember the piece I wrote a week or so ago, about
JD Wetherspoons’s and their charismatic founder and chief executive,
Tim Martin. The piece centered on the
pro-Brexit beer mats which
Mr Martin was distributing throughout his tied estate, which were in the form of a brief manifesto, telling the government to get on with the job, and take the country out of the
European Union.
Now I don’t want to re-open the argument which, somewhat predictably, ensued from the post, even though I strongly disagree with
Tim’s pro-Brexit views. Instead I want to write about how I once met the
Wetherspoon’s CEO, and the part I played in helping the chain’s
Tonbridge outlet to obtain its license, in the face of strong opposition.
Let’s go back a couple of decades, to when
Wetherspoon’s weren’t nearly as common as they are now in Britain’s towns, and the
Spoon’s name, and indeed brand, was not the household name it is today.
My involvement with
CAMRA meant I was at least familiar with
JDW, even though at the time, the company had no outlets in the part of
Kent where I live. I think at the time, the nearest Spoons to
West Kent, was either
Maidstone, or one of their London pubs, so the news that
Wetherspoons’s were planning to open an outlet in
Sevenoaks, was welcome indeed.
As I turned out though, the news was not welcome in certain quarters, especially by
Sevenoaks LVA (remember the
Licensed Victuallers Association? Those cosy associations of local licensees, all looking out for each other). More seriously, the prospect of the chain opening in the town was not welcome by the local constabulary. Both the
Sevenoaks LVA and
Kent Police launched an objection to the proposed opening, which ended with the matter being referred to the
County Court in
Maidstone.
A
CAMRA friend of mine called
Brian, who lived in
Sevenoaks, attended the hearing and spoke on behalf of
Wetherspoons, as did several other people. It’s a long time ago now, and I can’t remember if the case went to appeal, but the eventual outcome was the objections were thrown out, and
Wetherspoon’s duly went ahead and opened an outlet in the town in a converted furniture shop. It was called the
Sennockian, and is still trading today, although a few years ago it was on the list of pubs which
JDW had been planning to sell off.
My friend, was probably 25 years or so older than me, and was a retired
Chartered Surveyor. He was quite a character and spoke with a real air of authority. Sadly
Brian is no longer with us, but I remember him saying that prior to the court case, he had met with both
Tim Martin and
Wetherspoon’s barrister, and how pleased they were that an ordinary member of the public had come along to speak on the company’s behalf. Therefore when a similar situation arose, a few years later, Brian again offered his support to
JDW.
The case in question was even closer to home for me, as it involved an application from
Wetherspoon’s, to convert the former
Crown Post Office building in
Tonbridge, into a pub, and once again the local
LVA and
police wer
e objecting. I offered my support, as did a close friend of mine, who also lived in
Tonbridge.
Brian also said he would join us and, as he knew the ropes, so to speak, we allowed him to take care of the arrangements.
So, on the appointed day, we presented ourselves at the imposing
Crown Court buildings on Maidstone’s riverfront, and were introduced to
Tim Martin and the company’s barrister. We were also joined by a member of the
Tonbridge Civic Society; an organisation keen not only to preserve the
1930’s Post Office building, but eager to see it being used for a purpose which would benefit the town as a whole. We also learned from JDW’s lawyer, that the
LVA had dropped their objection, so it was now just the police who were contesting
Wetherspoons’s application.
We were then ushered into the court. This was my first, and so far only time inside a court of law, and it was evident from the start that such places are designed to intimidate and overawe those who find themselves
“up before the law”. Even for those like me and my two companions, they appear quite foreboding.
We didn’t have to wait long before the clerk of the court asked for us to
“all be upstanding”, as the judge and the respective legal teams filed into the court. Now I mentioned earlier that the case took place some time ago, probably a couple of decades in fact, so I can’t remember the exact order of proceedings, but I do recall that almost from the outset they didn’t go too well for the barrister representing the police.
She was a
Dawn French “look-alike”, but without the humour, and one particular remark she made really annoyed the judge, so much so that she was asked to withdraw it. The sole objection put forward by the police, was one of law and order, but the judge was quite dismissive of this argument. The
Spoon’s barrister was also quick to point out the company’s good record in controlling their outlets and spotting any trouble before it got out of hand.
The
Wetherspoon’s brief fared much better with the judge. He reminded me of
Rumpole of the Bailey, and he certainly didn’t receive the same amount of scrutiny as the police barrister. He called the representative from the local civic society as a witness in support of the application, along with my two friends, but after I’d got myself all psyched up, and ready to take the stand, he didn’t call me. So denied my moment in court, I sat down and followed the rest of the proceedings with interest.
Once both sides had presented their evidence, the court adjourned for lunch. Now lunch is a very serious matter for the legal profession, and it is probably no exaggeration to say that in the past, the fate of many a condemned person, depended on whether the judge had a good, or a bad lunch. These days, whilst we thankfully no longer hang people, the severity or indeed leniency of a sentence, might still depend on the quality of
His Honour's lunch.
My companions and I also grabbed a spot of lunch, choosing the nearest
Wetherspoon's pub of course! This was the
Muggleton Inn, across the
River Medway and then up the
High Street. It is one of two JDW outlets in Maidstone, and to my mind it is the best. The
Muggleton is an imposing two-storey building which was once the offices for an
insurance company. We made our way upstairs, grabbed a table and ordered ourselves a bite to eat.
We also had a beer each, but mindful that we might be considered
"in contempt of court", were we to come back intoxicated, just had the one. We also wanted to ensure we were back in time for the resumption of the case. We all thought the case had gone well so far, so were quietly optimistic that the Tonbridge Spoons would be awarded its licence.
Back in court, the afternoon session passed quickly, with
"His Honour" throwing out the objections lodged by the police. Costs were also awarded against
Kent Constabulary, but as a gesture of goodwill, the Spoon's brief said he would waiver the costs awarded to him, so as to not place too high a burden on the public purse; in this case the
council tax payers of Kent.
After the case, Tim Martin came and thanked us all personally, and told us that plans for the Tonbridge pub could now continue apace. I'm pretty certain the three of us received an invitation to the official opening of the pub, which was named the
Humphrey Bean, in honour of the landlord of a pub which once occupied the former
Post Office site.
I didn't attend the official opening, probably because it clashed with something going on at work but when, a few days later, I finally set foot in the
Humphrey Bean, I was decidedly underwhelmed.
I'm not sure what I was expecting, but whilst it's fair to say the pub is not one of
JDW's most imaginative conversions, the architects had a rather mish-mash of a building to work with, and consequently made the best of what was there. There is a smaller and quite cosy section at the front, and this is where the
post office counters once were, but leading off to the rear, is a much larger section, which was formerly the town's sorting office. This area still maintains its shed-like appearance, and is where the bar is situated.
To be fair, it is bright and airy, with plenty of tables, and includes a raised area on the left-hand side. This section leads through to a large, attractive and well laid out garden, which looks out across the
River Medway to Tonbridge's imposing
13th Century castle. This is without a doubt the Humphrey Bean's best feature.
So there we have it, the story of how I went along to play my part in ensuring that
Tonbridge gained a
Wetherspoon's and whilst, in the end, my input was not needed, I am still glad that I turned up at court to offer my support.
The
Humphrey Bean is now something of a
Tonbridge institution, and it is hard to imagine what the town was like before
Wetherspoon's came on the scene. So despite me being at odds with Tim Martin over his
Brexit ideology, I am pleased that he brought the
Spoon's brand to
Tonbridge, and I am also pleased that I was able to give him my support.