Having recently enjoyed a
Sonder around
Broadstairs, spoiler
alert - partially made-up word, although
AI is not responsible, exactly a week ago,
I headed over to
Tunbridge Wells, ostensibly on a clothes shopping expedition.
It was more of a
saunter really, plus an excuse, to visit a few local pubs, whilst at the same time following
Mrs PBT's suggestion to treat myself to a
“smart jacket”. By smart, I mean one suitable
for wearing in the evening, on board a cruise ship. It’s a style that’s best
described as
“smart casual”, and basically is a jacket, that I can wear with my
regular chinos, and a decent shirt (one with a collar). Nothing too fancy, if I
can help it, and definitely not too formal (or uncomfortable), but a garment
that will make an evening visit to the posh restaurant, or bars like the
Commodore Club, the
Chart Room etc much more pleasant. It will also stop the
“stuffed
shirts” staring at me, although as most of those seem to be ballroom dancers from
Pontefract, we can conveniently ignore them!
The fact that I’m splashing out on a new garment, when I’ve
spent part of the recent summer, getting rid of unwanted clutter, hints that
Mrs
PBT’s and I have another ocean-going cruise coming up. It’s booked for the last
week of
October, through into the first week in
November, and will see us heading
out into the
Atlantic on a voyage that takes in a couple of islands in the
Azores archipelago, before a two-day stopover in the lovely island of
Madeira.
We then head back towards mainland
Europe, where we will be calling at destinations
in both
Portugal and
Spain.
Seeking suitable attire for a gentleman/man-about-town, I
visited the recently renovated Marks & Spencer store in central Tunbridge
Wells, expecting to find options that would complement my style. Unfortunately,
I was disappointed that after extensively browsing the store – five minutes max,
suitable jackets were apparently, unavailable. When I asked a staff member for
assistance, she informed me that suits were in stock but not individual
jackets, and she was uncertain about future availability. I appreciated her
candour and resolved to check the website periodically for updates. With my
shopping concluded, I proceeded to complete my other, and far more important
errand, such as visiting a few local pubs.

My journey across to Tunbridge Wells began with an unduly
long wait for a bus into town. Eventually the 402 service, one of several
running between the two towns, turned up. Typically, this route is operated using
double-decker buses, but that particular service was a single deck vehicle,
which meant it was standing room only. Fortunately, quite a few passengers left
the bus at Southborough, allowing me to claim a seat. I remained on the bus
until the town's rail station, as the pubs I intended to visit were located at
the bottom end of town. I then made my way up the nearby Grove Hill Road before
stopping at a pub that has undergone several changes of name and ownership over
the years. I was curious to see what difference its latest reincarnation had
made.
The pub in question, has traded under various different
names during the four decades that I have been visiting
Tunbridge Wells, and
after many years as the
Kentish Yeoman, this
Victorian town alehouse, has been
the
Black Pig, the
Orson Wells and is now known as the
Claremont. It is a two-minute
walk from the station, and is a deceptively large and rambling restaurant-cum-pub.
It is reported as having a large garden
at the rear, but I can’t vouch for this. It had been many years since I last
set foot in the pub, so I wasn’t quite sure what to expect. Upon entering I
noticed a sign indicating that the pub is managed by
Brakspear’s of Henley-on-Thames,
a name I’m sure all beer lovers remember with sadness, following the owning
family’s decision to close the brewery, and become a
pub-co instead. There are
at least two other
Brakspear’s owned pub locally, with the
George & Dragon,
Speldhurst, plus the
Leicester Arms, at
Penshurst, springing to mind.
Nothing much seemed to be happening in the pub, and with no
one present behind the bar, the enforced wait allowed me time to look around. I
shall refer you to the pub’s website, for an over-effusive description of the
pub, but despite that, the beer options, for serious connoisseurs seemed confined
to a mix of the latest “in-vogue” lagers, plus the odd token craft beer.
I can’t tell you which ones, as I neglected to take a photo, but had I stayed
longer I’m sure I would have done.

It was still quite early, and the fact that
the clip on the single hand-pump had been turned round, didn’t allow for much
optimism on the cask ale front. When the barman eventually appeared, he
confirmed my fears about the lack of cask, so I asked for a flat white coffee
instead. He muttered something about the pub not having a coffee machine, which
seemed incredible for an establishment with such upmarket aspirations, but he
could “do me a coffee with cold milk”. I presume he meant a cup of instant
coffee, which wasn’t at all what I was looking for. I politely declined his offer
and bade him farewell.
On the basis of what I’d experienced since stepping into the
Claremont, my verdict was one that was definitely “underwhelming”, especially
on a Friday lunchtime, when might expect the pub to be busier. In addition,
when viewed against the puff-piece on the Claremont’s website, I was beginning
to think that I’d walked into the wrong place, altogether. Take a look, and you
will see what I mean.
Undeterred, I continued up the hill and took one of the
turnings into the area known as the
Grove. I hesitate to call this area
a park, even though it has a play area with swings and a side, but the main
users of the of this green space, appear to be dog walkers. Sited in the middle
of
Tunbridge Wells, the
Grove is a very pleasant and welcoming public space,
and despite its proximity to the shops, the rail station and the general hustle
and bustle of a busy
west-Kent town, an air of peace and tranquillity hangs
over the place. The leaf canopy from the many trees, helps filter out the noise
of the traffic, although in a month or so’s time this will all change, as the
annual, autumn leaf fall gets underway.
Virtually hidden by
the trees, is the rear entrance to the
Compasses, a pub with the distinction of being
one of the oldest, and one of the cosiest pubs in
Tunbridge Wells. It's a long time since I last set foot in the
place, and trying to find the entrance from the
Grove, was as difficult as
I remember. I walked along the path, which skirts the periphery of the park,
and for a short while, things didn’t look too hopeful. It wasn’t until I was
almost right upon it, that I found the moderately overgrown entrance leading to
the rear of the pub. With parts dating from the early
17th century, the
Compasses blends in well with its surroundings.
There are still two separate bars, plenty of old wooden
beams and floors, plus a number of open fireplaces. Leading off from the bars
is a space set aside for dining with a quieter snug area looking out over the sunny
terrace at the front of the building. The pub also has its own, small garden
close to the
Grove. My request for a flat white was more successful than in the
previous establishment, and I was served a nice, and well-presented cup of
coffee. At £3.00 this represented better value than the
Costa’s and
Starbucks of
this world, and was light years away from the instant coffee, with a dash of
cold milk, offered at the
Claremont.
As I sat enjoying my drink, I couldn’t help chuckling at the
dithering of two, late, middle-aged couples who’d met up for a meal. They took ages
deciding which table and which chairs to sit at, and then they weren’t sure whether
to have a lite-bite, or something more substantial. The thing that really made
me laugh though, was the insistence of one of the men for a
“best bitter” for
his lunchtime tipple.
This could be
interesting I thought, as the gentleman in question was obviously not a regular
pub goer. Sure enough, his request threw both the bar staff and the customer
himself into a state of confusion, when it came to deciding which of the
several bitters on sale, might be classed as
“best”.
By this time, I too found myself fancying a glass of bitter,
best or otherwise, so I wandered into the left-hand bar, where the pumps were
situated, to check out what was on offer. My eye was drawn to a striking looking,
sky-blue coloured pump clip, advertising a beer called
Genevieve. This is a
cask beer, brewed as a collaboration between
Greene King and
Thornbridge, which
later research revealed to be a hop-forward, clean and crisp,
West Coast IPA,
with an
ABV of
4.5%. This collaboration beer looked really tempting, so imagine
my disappointment at being told that the beer was
“resting”. I presumed the
young barman meant the beer hadn’t settled yet, although it was quite obvious the
young lad didn't really know much about the mystique involved with cask ale
(train your staff properly!)
That's a
shame I said, as I really fancied the
Genevieve, and with
IPA and
Abbot not
really ticking the right boxes, I made my excuses and left a pub, for the
second time that afternoon.
Departing via the front door, I paused to take a few photos
on the way. My eye was drawn to another pub which serves the needs of this
“village” area of
Tunbridge Wells. Sited further down the hill, in the
direction of the
High Street, is the
Grove Tavern, a smallish pub with an
l-shaped bar. The first thing visible on entering, is a pool table which takes
up most of the front bar, a feature I always think is rather off-putting. I
also find the pub to be rather cliquey, and although I know quite a few of the
people who drink there, I’ve never been overly keen on the place. The
Grove ticks
all the right boxes with
CAMRA though, as it’s a
Good Beer Guide regular, and
keeps a well-cared for range of
Harvey’s Best, Timothy Taylor's plus the odd guest
beer or two.
I didn't fancy the
Grove Tavern that Friday, so I headed back up the hill and then into the top
part of the Grove. I then walked through the park and after crossing the road,
found myself in a narrow street, containing a row of well-kept, terraced
Victorian terraced houses. A narrow gate, at the far end of the road led into
another of Tunbridge Well’s famous green spaces, namely Calverley Grounds, a
popular and historic park with attractive lawns, ornamental gardens and welcoming
café. During the run-up to Christmas,
there is also an ice-rink, located on an area of flat ground, below the Calverley
Hotel, now known as the Hotel du Vin. On Friday, the grounds were busy with
people, mainly young, out for a stroll.
Time for one more beer before heading for the bus stop. I
was in a bit of a hurry to get out of
Tunbridge Wells, because come mid to late
afternoon, the local schools all spill out at the conclusion of the academic
day. There are three or four schools at the
St John’s end of
Tunbridge Wells and
then going through towards
Southborough. With hundreds of pupils, spiling out
onto the streets at the same time, all pushing, shoving and jostling for space,
travelling by bus, during this period is definitely best avoided. I therefore wanted
to make sure I was sat on the bus before it got crowded and full of boisterous
schoolchildren. They are normally quite well behaved, just a little noisy and
excited, especially at the end of the week.
The pub I was making for was the Guinea, in Calverley Road,
an establishment that has had a substantial of money thrown at it recently. Formerly known
as Guinea Butt, but now just the plain “Guinea”. I can't
remember the last time I visited this town pub, but it must have been a long
time ago, and as I stepped inside the first thing that struck me was the large
expanses of dark wood. The interior was surprisingly spacious, certainly when compared
against the pub’s frontage.
At the bar there were hand pumps for beers from
Pig &
Porter, alongside
Downland, but the ones that caught my eye were dispensed from
the
T-bar and consisted of several genuine
Oktoberfest beers. The
bartender was enthusiastic and also very knowledgeable about Oktoberfest and
its attendant beers, so we had a brief conversation, about this annual event. I
chose the versions from Hacker-Pschorr, which is a slightly darker and more
robust brew compared to some of the others. He also mentioned that all the
Märzen beers from the festival were now available, at the Guinea, which was another
plus point for me.
The pub itself wasn’t overly busy, although there were several
parties of
“ladies that lunch”, and I obviously chose the wrong area to sit.
I did consider moving away from the closest of
these groups, particularly when the topic got around to breastfeeding, who was
managing OK and who was having difficulties. It certainly wasn’t your average
lunchtime conversation, but at the same time it is a perfectly natural thing,
and if one or two group members were having trouble, or just seeking
reassurance, then where more natural to talk about it than amongst your peers? (A slightly less public location might have been better, and certainly more discreet!) Moving swiftly on, the
beer was very good, and if I hadn’t been rushing to catch that
3pm bus, I almost certainly
would have stayed for another.
As I made my way towards the row of bus stops, there were
already signs that the school exodus had begun. I didn’t have long to wait for
a
Tonbridge bound bus, and surprisingly very few school passengers were onboard.
The same applied for the journey back to
Tonbridge, which was just as well as
it allowed me to scoff the reduced, price roast chicken and stuffing sandwich
that I'd purchased in
M&S. You're not supposed to eat on
Arriva buses, but
I was on the upstairs deck, and whilst I might have been visible on the
vehicle's
CCTV, no one said anything. I arrived back in
Tonbridge just in time
to cross the road and wait for the
219 bus, that would take me up the hill, and
back to
Bailey Towers.
Mrs PBT's said I should have just looked online, something I actually
did in the end, and I’m currently waiting for the jacket to be delivered.
However, she didn't quite suss out the logic behind me wanting to visit the
town in person. It was the opportunity to visit a few Tunbridge Wells pubs,
ones which, with the honourable exception of the Compasses, I wouldn’t normally
have set foot in, that made that unsuccessful shopping trip, all the more worthwhile.